Look Outward

I've been thinking a lot about everything that's gone on this transfer and how I ever got to this point in my mission. I remember thinking at times I wouldn't even make it a day let alone six months, a year and so forth. And to now be where I am (8 weeks left), sometimes I can only think of my fears of what's to come. Living in the moment is a blessing. Thinking about the future is a nightmare....my mission President told me in interviews to focus on what I can control and everything else would fall into place and to start making plans for when I'm home. -ugh....

Monday I lost my debit card....talk about living a nightmare...but yet all I could think was to pray. I knew Heavenly Father would help, for only he knew where it was. Tuesday, I found it, right before bed. It was in my bag, between a bunch of pass along cards...don't ask how it got there. I searched my bag 3-4 times, until I found it.

This week they announced the open house for the Fort Collins temple in August!!! Whatever it take, I'm going to come back for it (rode trip with Sister Helsing and some others) And what better way to celebrate my birth month!

Tuesday our phone stopped working, basically the mission office reassigned our number to someone else and we had a phone that had no service. And since we are roaming here in Nebraska we had to meet the AP's in Sidney on Saturday and get our phone. Which was a blessing. Talk about a crazy day. My companion isn't used to not seeing other missionaries daily. Saturday, we met the AP's, had lunch with the Sidney sisters, and our district leader let us into their church building to do area calls. So we saw 8 missionaries total. 4 companionships. It was nice to see my companion happy. I also got a package from the Henries and look, it's a blow up Elephant 🐘

Sunday we had branch council, we didn't have a lot of things to report on, our branch council members keep good tabs on us through out the week which is nice. At the very end of the meeting I felt I should check the phone, one of the less actives we just met Wednesday night, sent us a text telling us her son and daughter would be at church. I then invited everyone still in the room to welcome them back. It was a very tender moment seeing them walk in the church building.

District meeting was so good this week!! Funny part was Sister Helsing popping my back. The spirit was so strong! It's not been an easy 5 weeks, but if it was easy it wouldn't be worth it...but I have felt and seen myself grow so much! Being an hour drive to the closet next set of missionaries and not being able to talk to family or friends has truly left me with only Heavenly Father to turn to. Yes, I have a companion, but there are some things that you just can't talk to others about. I've seen so many answers to prayers. I've seen myself look more outward to help others than ever before (last two weeks ...I could have been better but overall). I've seen little catch phrases get stuck in my head to help me keep going. Here are some below

"Its not where you live but how..." - Forgotten Carols

"Feel so hopeless I want to scream...one who understands" -Nashville tribute band

"Hold on thy way" -Nashville tribute band

"Christ is aware of his girls!" -Sister Bair

Sometimes life just feels so crazy, other times everything seems to be so right. This transfer I've felt I have to be the "strong one" many of you know I'm not very strong, others have seen me cry more this transfer than ever before....but let me tell you even with everything going on in the mission field I've never felt Heavenly Fathers love for me so strong. I know He is there. I know He knows us. He loves us! I realized this week that I don't have to be "the strong one" Christ is that for each of us. It's okay to cry, it's okay to feel weak, but in those moments we need to turn to Christ.

This week I saw the need for me to look outward. I saw my need to look to my fellow man and love and serve them. Which sometimes I struggle with. Let me say it's good to be wanted, but it feels better to be needed. I don't know why I'm here in Alliance, Nebraska but I know I have a purpose in being here. Even if I wasn't at Brooke's baptism Saturday (which I wanted so badly to be at) I know God has a purpose in where he has placed me. It's been really neat even if I've spent just 5 weeks planting seeds, or nourishing them. It's the Lords work and either way it's moving forward.

Today (Monday) Sister Bair, one of the most amazing people I know here did our make up. It was nice to not have to do it myself.

Keep Pushing Forward!

This week was....well things are getting better, I think.

We had a Relief Society activity this week. During this activity we got our nails done. Sister Bair did mine! She's amazing! But they had quotes out on each table, and one of my favorite people had a quote they used, Lucille Ball, which reads " love yourself first and everything else falls in line. You really have to yourself to get anything done in this world"

We had zone meeting this week, and interviews with our mission president. That was good. It really got me thinking about a lot of things. President helped me see that I have so many things I have control over, and that I truly can keep pushing forward, even when things are tough. There has been moments when I don't want to keep going, but I know why I'm here, and it's because I love the Lord. It's interesting because I've dealt with stress by keeping busy - like my whole life- well this area...we currently still don't have a lot to keep as busy as I'd like. Which has also made me think when I go home I'll be stressed (more than likely lets be honest) and probably won't be to busy at first, So I'm finding other ways to deal with how I feel and etc.

Thank Goodness, we had exchanges this week. I stayed in Alliance, but I was with Sister Helsing, my sister, so it was good. I love her so much! She has helped me more than anyone will ever know! She sang to me, listened to me and hugged me so much- she gives the best hugs!! She is one of the many people I'm grateful Heavenly Father gave me her here in Nebraska! She's serving in Sidney...and I got to be with her on her last exchange! Crazy!

On exchanges we got a new investigator!! Like, our first one all transfer! Her name is Amber. She is super sweet. We taught her the restoration and she told us she believes it's true! Holy Flip! We will met with her on Wednesday.

On exchanges it was good to be able to tell someone my goals for now to the end of my mission, to even some goals for after. It was good to be able to talk about everything so I am accountable to someone else, aside from Heavenly Father. It was nice to talk about fears I have of going home -which is forever from now, let's face it. But still. But it was fun talking about how we'd do companionship study after the mission....let's face it it'd be fun but probably won't happen. Part of me hopes it does happen. She goes home 7 weeks before me.

Friday we got lost on the way to dinner....that was an adventure. Thank goodness for some nice neighbors who could point us in the right direction...but it made me think of how we have guides along the way in life, and how important is it to follow them to a T. If not it will take a bit till we get it right. And how important it is to have a guide you trust. That what I relearned Friday night. Although we were late, we made it safely, and followed our guides directions.

Valentine's Day was not very eventful. And it shouldn't be. Especially as a missionary. We should tell those we love, we love them any day, time, etc. However my dear sister, Sis. Abby Henrie sent me Vday Aloe socks, sweethearts(convo hearts-my favorite) and m&m's. My companion Hermana Areno gave me a package of convo hearts. And Saturday I got some letters and such in the mail. Thank you. I hope -even if I hate Valentines Day- that each of you were able to feel loved by those around you, Heavenly Father or etc. I know Heavenly Father loves each of us, he knows us and wants us to be happy. A dear sister (Sister Helsing) shared this scripture and it has gotten me through this week

"Believe in God; believe that he is, and that he created all things, both in Heaven and in Earth; Believe that he has all wisdom, and all power, both in Heaven and in Earth; believe that man doth not comprehend all things which the Lord can comprehend." - Mosiah 4:9

I know that he knows us, he created us. He knows how we feel. Yesterday at church Sister Hancock made the comment " No one understands OUR suffering like the Savior." I know this to be true. We each may be able to relate to one another. But our Savior has felt what each of us feels when we go through it ourselves. Only he knows. I'm grateful to know I'm never alone with what I'm going through. My testimony has grown so much these last 4 weeks and how grateful I am for that. I wouldn't take back my trials. I know I must keep the faith, and keep going.

So everyone keep the faith, things will work out.

Challenges of Change

This week has been an adventure. Right now I'm trying to keep my head above water.

 For the last few weeks a quote from Frozen has been at the top of my mind. Olfa "True love is putting someone else before yourself" and "your worth melting for" -mostly the first one.

The last couple weeks I've seen so many answers to prayers and the spirit truly at work. I'm so grateful for this. This week has been eventful, needless to say. I'm no longer training and I have a new companion. Yes, three weeks into the transfer. Talk about adjusting.

I feel that's what 2016 has in store for me...lots and lots of adjusting. Well, we will keep this short...lets just say to kill stress, our Branch president's daughter gave us some of her older stuffed animals, and we killed them. Below is the eagle. Piggie died as well, the bears and panda lived.

 Sister Bair took us to see Carthage Jail. I got a new companion this week, Her name is Hermana Areno. She's from Las Vegas. Who knows how long we will be together. But I'm 11 months older. Right now I just want to end my mission strong. I don't care about training, or having a new companion, etc. I just want to take care of the one thing I can control!

A Low Week With A Love for Missionary Work!

Well I'd just like to say the last week has been a roller coaster, filled with many different emotions. At some point in my mission, a good friend wrote me an email and told me mission are just that way...but this has taken a whole new extreme. I know what you may be thinking, but let the no longer teenager me say..."you just don't understand."

Worst moment - A family took us for dinner Monday....for pizza...I was not well for days. Worst its ever been!!

Funniest, weirdest moment this week...brought me to tears even though it probably shouldn't have....oh well. We were eating dinner with a family and the oldest son (he has special needs.) He's 17 or 18. Anyways so we are at a buffet so we all go up to get our food, and he asks the question " which one of you has brown hair?" Well obliviously not me...so we say "sister Henrie does!" He smiles. We are then going up for seconds ( it's a buffet, don't judge) and he's watching us but no biggie. While sitting there we are talking to Cat, she's like 15. Pretty funny, she reminds me of Kim. :) So the mom has to make a phone call, during this time the oldest son says to Sister Henrie "Can I tell you something?" She's silent. He then says "you are the miracle I've been dreaming of!" He then blows her a kiss!!! I lost it. I was laughing so hard. Yes, to the point of tears. I wish each of you could have been there it was too funny!

This week I got a phone call, asking what airport I'll be flying into. And so forth....I wish I could say this was my lowest moment. Sadly it wasn't. I know some people are happy and look forward to going home, but I've said it before and I'll say it again...I'd extend for 18 more months if I could. A mission has been the best thing ever for me! I couldnt even tell you how much of a blessing its been for me. Every day has been a new adventure.

If you look at numbers...which don't account for many efforts invested...they are so low...like even accounting active people we taught 12 total lessons. Its a good thing I'm not number happy person.

Yesterday, I gave a talk in sacrament. It was probably one of the worse talks I've even given. It was on "my purpose in God's plan"

Alliance is the best thing that has happened to me. I know that sounds crazy! But I love the town and the people here.

My companion is amazing, I know Heavenly Father put us here for a reason! I love this sister with every fiber of my being. I truly just want her to be happy.

I'm so grateful for all that has been going on. Trials are tough. But they allow us to grow. That I am thankful for.

Exciting Week With a New Sister!

Monday the Goins took us for lunch at one of my favorite places, Red Robin. It was hard leaving Wellington. I love the people there so much! But now after six months they are free of one Burden. -haha

Transfer day Tuesday was fun...

We were told to be there at 9am, well the sisters I was to be with for the night wouldn't even be there till 4pm....so Sister Jenson and Sister Malekamu stayed with me, took me to lunch at Costco! -yum! It was pretty fun. And I got to see my grand daughter...sister Wesley! She's pretty fun- from what I know. I've never got to serve around her. This was only my second time meeting her.

Tuesday night I stayed in Wellington and attended the Relief Society activity, it was nice because the sister being swept in to our area got to met a lot of the sisters in the ward.

Wednesday -get your trainee day!

So we had to met the Assistants at 8, so we had time to take a picture of our one night long trio then we had to be at the meeting at 9, and watch the broadcast at 10. So needless to say it was a crazy morning....we didn't even get them till about 12:30ish...to be honest it's a blur now. We then had to go to the mission office, and wait for them to give us our phone, seeing as how they didn't want to send us without one! After we had to go to the mission home then go get lunch (3:30ish) thanks for the subway gift card! It helped! We then had to stop in Cheyenne to get bedding and some food to eat, then back on the road....we got into Alliance at 8pm, on our good drive up we finally were able to get a hold of the ward clerk whose wife is the relief society president, (the Bairs) they told us to come have dinner and they would help us carry our stuff to the apartment -the elders trashed! (If only I had taken photos. ) needless to say our first night was rough.

Thursday - on the go!!!

We had to end studies abrupt and go to district meeting, the meeting we had just planned for the day fell through and I felt a sense of despair I could only hope with how the day started out that it would get better. But with everything we planned only 2 things went according to plans. We met our ward mission leader, and had dinner again at the Bairs, they are so sweet, and they are good about not feeding me dairy because their son can't have dairy. -how nice!

We got lost, and it was a rough day but I figured with more sleep awaiting us the next day would be better...

Friday- Lets do this day!

Our branch President told us we needed to clean our house before we did anything else...ugh! So we started to clean a little at lunch, we had spent our lunch hour the day before but our apartment needed some major tlc. So we did just what we were asked we spent some time getting settled in. We weekly planned.

The Smith family took us for lunch (Mexican food) -so good! It was nice to get some names of people to go and see! Brother Smith is the High Priest Group Leader. We were trying to visit those in branch council...we didn't get to many but we got a good start.

Saturday - Work, Work, Work

We tried to visit as many people as we could. And success came of that!

We found a new investigator! Her name is Riley, shes 15. We will see whats to come with this. Riley's grandma is a member. Not sure why the Elders dropped her (their area book isn't up to date) but hopefully we can help her find what shes looking for.

We had dinner with our Branch President and his wife (left kids at home) and took us to the Mexican Restaurant-haha.

We met with some less actives and that was so good!

The Dillards are a less active family, the husband wants to come back, but the wife isn't ready. They are such a sweet family! It was nice to be able to share with them the Restoration... it seems that's all we've taught- for the most part this week!

Sunday- should be refreshing.....

Sunday started out good, we went to branch council...and our high council man is from my home stake. (forgot name) That was really cool!

I heard a quote yesterday that brought me lots of relief

"It's not okay because it's not the end, It will be okay in the end."

We got home from church, and Sister Henrie had a melt down, its been rough- My trainer put up with so many melt downs from me....sometimes I wonder how she ever could have loved me! I was a mess, and all I want is to help her and I feel everything I try is failing or we get somewhere and she slips back into despair. Yesterday, she just wanted to call home, and I wanted so bad to tell her to just do it...we instead tried calling Sister Brown, she didn't answer...so I sent a text...sent my trainee to take a nap, and prayed so hard that Sister Brown would call us back and give some Motherly advice....I finally stopped praying and began to read in the scriptures soon enough I looked up, and the phone lite up...It was Sister Brown was calling!!!! I can't express how happy I was in this moment. But even her motherly words didn't seem to help.

Yesterday we had a lesson with Sister Lewis a less active...she has so many health problems, and shes so young. She has 3 kids. During our visit she talked about how she just wanted to feel beautiful in her body, and of how she when she had her walker she was embarrassed to go in public, all I could think of was the Mormon message "My new life." So I asked if she had ever heard of this ladies story, she told me no...I asked if we could watch a video and talk about it after, she agreed...we watched the video after we talked about the atonement and how we can find peace and happiness because of our Savior. Tears were in her eyes and the spirit was so strong.

I can not even express t you how happy I am to be here in Alliance. I'm grateful for my trainee Sister Henrie and for her pushing through this first week. She is who I need at this time to be my companion. I may not know whats to come but I know Heavenly Father has put us both here for a reason. I know our Father in Heaven is aware of us and loves us. I couldn't be more grateful for the members here and for their love.

Monday- Pday

Sister Bair and her 3 little boys came today and helped us wipe down walls and clean....totaled all together we have put in about 5-6 hours...in cleaning, its making progress but little by little.

Transferred and Training!

So sorry this is short . . . .

But transfer news . . .

I'm going to Alliance, Nebraska.

It's new in the mission, just added three weeks ago, and I'm excited. I will also be training a new missionary! My "dying" wish is coming true . . . well, not the Nebraska part but I will miss the mountains. But The Lord knows I'm needed there.

Wellington has been amazing! I'm grateful for those I've come close to, and the experiences I've had here. I know I was here for many different reasons. The people here are amazing!

"What do you think I should do?" . . . Pray

Week 6 (This Week)

We met with Rosemary which was a good visit...I tried to invite her to baptism, she didn't say yes but that's still because she wants John the Baptist to do it. (oh boy!)

Ate at Big City Burrito -it was good!

We met with a less active family, there daughter is taking the lessons...the mom is now giving up coffee and if she has some she owes her daughter 50$...her daughter is giving up candy and if she gives in she has to do whatever chores her mom wants her to do for a week. We are praying the mom wins!

We painted at the Daknis's home, so fun! That's my favorite service project. I love painting!

Dale a less active took us to HuHot! It's pretty good!

We had dinner with the Jacksons which was good. They a really funny especially with the Sharps there. Although dinner went over I know Heavenly Father hand was involved in that. On the way home from leaving there house we saw a car with its hazards on...we drove around to the car window and asked if they were okay and if we could help...she asked if we could help get her 15 yr old daughter back into the car....so we pulled over and when getting out of the car the snow on the side of the road went up to my knees...I also wasn't wearing boots...I had flats on-bad idea! We walked with her trying to talk with her but she wasn't budging...(her mom was slowing lighting the way in her truck behind us) my companion finally was said she was going to go talk to the mom....while she left I continued to walk with Lily...I was freezing but all I could think was how can I help her? I starting with asking simple questions like colors, what her family was like etc, if she had a boyfriend, and so forth. Right after my comp left (she rode in the truck) lily opened up so much! She didn't ever tell me why she was walking...after a bit I finally asked if she wanted to ask me any questions....she asked what my family was like growing up, if my hometown was modest, about running from problems, some beliefs in the church and finally she asked how I was able to forgive those who had hurt me, Earlier she had said she didn't believe in God but I had briefly bore testimony of the Savior while walking... At this point I was praying my words would be guided, I talked of how through Christ that's they only way I've been able to and of how it was a process. After 30 plus minutes of walking in snow on the side of the road Lily started slowing her pace and finally asked "What do you think I should do?" I told her it didn't matter what I thought...I told her she should pray about it, and that with whatever her choice was she needed to do it for her, she stopped walking and stated crying, we hugged and she told me she wanted to go back....so we walked back to the truck, and got in. I'm so grateful for this experience. Know we are praying we can met Lily again...we have her last name and the town she lives it...now to find her. My feet were so cold and very red and wet when we got in last night...but I wouldn't take it back for anything.

I'm grateful for the Atonement. I know our Savior knows each of us and loves us. He knows what it's like to argue with our family and to want to run away from our problems...because he knows everything we will ever feel in this life. I know this is true.

Today we went to the temple which was really nice! We went to Ben &Susan Harrison's wedding! It was so good! I love them so much! Before Jenny and us stopped by Krispy Creme. So good! Red light was on!